"Shut up. It's your fault."

Akutagawa Jirou chuckled.

    "And I thank you guys for it," he said in response to Shishido Ryou's comment. "I can't believe this day has finally come."

    "Let's just hope -san doesn't get—" Mukahi Gakuto began before being elbowed in the stomach by Oshitari Yuushi. Jirou's smile faded slightly.

"Cold feet."

stood in front of a tall body length mirror, the white gown cascading down to the floor, accentuating her slender body and ivory skin. Her brown hair was half up with curls flowed over her shoulders and halfway down her back. A faint smile was on her face, but her brown eyes stared out the window. Church bells rang.

One.

Two.

Three.

Three rings. Three o'clock. Half an hour. Half an hour before she would be tied down. T he intervals between looking out the window and at the mirror became increasingly smaller and smaller before finally stopping. She took a deep breath and her decision was made.

---

One. Two. Three. It was thirty minutes ago that the church bells rang. Thirty minutes ago? That meant…

    "Jirou!"

He heard a voice, but couldn't bring himself to answer it. Then a snap, and he felt himself lifted through the air.

    "Pu—put me down!" Jirou exclaimed, his arms and legs flailing wildly. He wondered, even after years of growing, that Kabaji was still able to pick him up so easily.

    "Yare yare…even at a time like this, you still fell asleep." Atobe said, brushing slender fingers through his soft hair.

    "With thirty more minutes left, now I won't be able to," Jirou said after being allowed to touch the floor again. He tidied himself up in front of the mirror.

    "Ready to wait at the altar?" Ohtori said, standing beside Jirou in the mirror, still taller than the dark blond youth. Jirou's anxious face troubled him.

    "Hey, what's up, Jirou?" Shishido said, clapping a hand on his long-time friend's shoulder.

    "Something doesn't feel right," Jirou responded. No one had to ask what he meant. 's maid of honor burst through the doors.

    "She's gone!"

---

Jirou sat alone in a separate room, reading over and over the words left by on a letter, her neat, round handwriting reduced to barely readable scrawls, evidence of anxiety and difficulty. Jirou foulded the paper and put it in his breast pocket. He didn't worry about her coming back. He worried about what they would say about her.

They didn't understand her. They shouldn't be saying anything about her at all. had never let him down. Not once.

---

    "Jirou, I'm leaving."

It was the last year of high school. was to study abroad as a part of the prestigious transfer program. They had only been going out for three months at the time.

    "What do you want me to say about that?"

    "I don't know."

He was angry with her at the time. How could she leave him like that? She had also apparently known of it for a long time, and only chose to disclose it to him the day before she was leaving.

    "I don't know. But…say something!"

    "Does this mean we have to break up?"

He had said it so casually, it came out all wrong. 's smile faltered a bit, but she continued on, her voice holding an unexpected vehemence.

    "No."

He didn't know what to say. He wasn't exactly expecting her to break up with him, but he wasn't expecting such intensity either.

    "Jirou, just because I'm leaving Japan doesn't mean I'm leaving you." Her voice was softer this time. "I'll come back in a year, and my love for you will only be stronger. I promise."

---

She kept that promise. It was why he was sitting in a church six years later. He had unexpectedly felt so empty during that whole year. It got so bad that he couldn't even sleep some nights, and anyone who knew him could tell you that he missed her bad. And here again, she was gone. But this time she wasn't thousands of miles away. He didn't want to feel that pain, that loneliness again. He was going to find her.

---

stood, looking at her reflection in the water. Her veil was still placed neatly on her head, and she had been careful not to let her dress get dirty. Why did she do that? What was she doing? She loved Jirou, with everything she had, so why was that window so enticing? And why did it ultimately become her escape?

It was simple.

She was a coward.

She loved him, that much she knew. But did Jirou love her as much as he said he did?

---

    "Why do you look like that today?"

It was their second year of college. It was a nice, spring day. Flowers were blossoming around them everywhere as they went on their weekly picnic.

    "I don't know what you mean," responded, her smile obviously being forced.

    "I thought we were being honest now," Jirou said, grabbing 's hand, entwining their fingers. "Every year, on the exact same day, your face falls just as it does right now." stared at Jirou through her fingers, the engagement ring partially blocking her view. "So talk." lowered her hand, but Jirou would not let go.

    "It's just…" she began, staring at the floor as they continued walking. How could she say it? How could she tell him, her fiancé, that a past love was still hurting her.

    "." Jirou stopped, and turned to face him. She'd never seen his face so serious.

    "I was hurt, okay? On this day, this month, I was hurt. Really bad." She couldn't stop the tears from forming at her eyes. She tried her best to keep them back, but she knew that if she blinked, they would fall. Jirou didn't say anything. He looked at her softly, placing a hand gently at the base of her neck. "He told me…that I wasn't worth a thing. I was only his rebound."

    "How long ago was that, ?"

    "What?"

    "How long?"

    "Eight years ago…"

    "And it still bothers you?"

    "Well, when someone tells you that you're worth nothing…" Jirou chuckled softly.

    "…you're…everything to me. That doesn't make you worthless at all. Without you…I just don't know what I'd do…"

    "Jirou…" Jirou pulled to him, and she buried her face into his chest. She closed her eyes, letting her tears fall because of that reason for the last time.

---

snapped out of her reverie to come face to face with her image in the water. So upset with herself, she threw a hand into the water and distorted the image of herself. It was false anyway. The innocence of a white gown and the added beauty from the make-up made her seem perfect. And she was anything but.

But that wasn't what she hated herself for.

She hated herself because she could not bring herself to turn around and walk back to the church, to turn around and face her fears, to turn around and allow their souls to be unified by the sacred bond of marriage. But what exactly was she running from? She could not even answer it herself, but she knew that the anxiety within her was enough to know that she had to get out or be crushed by apprehension.

But now that she was out, she didn't know where to go. Every time she need to get away, to run away, Jirou was the one she'd go to. But now that she couldn't even do that…

Not knowing what to do, turned around and once more stared at her false image, a single leaf placing itself gently over her eyes.

---

He had told them all to meet up again in front of the church gates. It had been a whole fifteen minutes, and he did not doubt that they were trying their hardest to find her. But as each one appeared again without the blushing bride, Jirou was starting to get anxious. Tired from the emotional and physical stress, his knees buckled and he was forced to squat on the ground, burying his face in agony. No one knew what to say.

    "…" came Jirou's muffled voice through his hands. Sliding his hands downward and off his face, he stared into the sky. "Where are you?" Struggling a bit, he brought himself to his feet. "You've got to be around here somewhere…but where? We've looked everywhere."

    "Jirou," Atobe said.

    "What?" Jirou responded, turning to face his former tennis club buchou.

    "Think back to the entire time we've been here," Atobe told him.

    "Why?" Jirou told him, annoyed. They were trying to find his bride. Not trying to make memories. What did this have to do with finding ?

    "Just think. Is there any place that you two have been where you two could have made an important decision? Had an unforgettable memory?" Atobe continued.

    "What?" Jirou just asked again. What was he getting at?

    " might be there," Atobe answered bluntly. Jirou didn't respond. Atobe was right. It was a little cliché, but Atobe was right. Thinking back to the entire two weeks they'd been there preparing for the wedding, countless places filled his mind. It was all in a jumble, but he didn't have time to sort it all out.

    "Something important…" Jirou muttered to himself, pacing to try to clear his mind. "Something memorable…" His mind was slowly clearing up, the previous swamp of memories making way for one specifically. "I've got it." He didn't even tell his friends where he was going as he took off at full speed, determined to find her and bring her back in time for the wedding. So that they'd stop talking about her, so that they'd realize that he wasn't too good for her, but that she was too good for him. "…wait for me…"

---

had taken off her heels long ago, still afraid to sit down on the basin of the fountain, afraid to dirty her white gown. Her arms were tired form holding up the bottom of her dress so they wouldn't touch the floor. And she was getting tired from receiving so many stares from so many strangers.

    'Yeah, what do you want?' she'd say in her mind to the strangers. 'I'm a bride. A…a runaway bride.' And she'd realize she deserved to receive such jeering stares.

But despite all these things making her uncomfortable, she couldn't bring herself to run away again. She'd turn away from the fountain, only to be drawn in once again. Her image became more and more unbearable to look at, but she'd force herself to look, to remind herself that she was not worthy of anything, let alone a wonderful man such as Jirou.

    'Hn. So that's it,' thought to herself. She'd figured it out, the reason for running away.

Jirou deserved so much better.

But she stayed rooted to the ground. She loved him too much. Now she was caught up in indecision, and she loathed her own existence even more.

    "I remember the day we first met," came a voice from behind her, sound out of breath. She didn't even have to turn around to know who it was. "You were wallowing in your self-pity. Don't tell me you're doing it again."

    "Jirou…" said under her breath. She couldn't bring herself to face him.

    "I thought I had helped you out of that stage, come to find you've let yourself back in," Jirou said, his voice revealing he was going back to his regular breathing.

    "Jirou, I can't—" began, only to be interrupted.

    "I don't want to hear it, you made a promise to me , to let me have all of you. And you promised, you'd never break any of the promises you made," Jirou said, his voice taking on a demanding tone. "Right here, at this very fountain. And I won't have any of your self-pitying get in the way of that promise."

    "Jirou, will you just listen to me?" said quick enough so as not to be interrupted again.

    "What, so I can hear you say that I deserve better?" Jirou asked. 's eyes opened wide. "I know you too well. I know you so well, that I know that I want you. All of you. And I know what's best for me, and it's you. You only."

    "Jirou…" said, not knowing what else to say.

    "Now, I'm giving you two choices, , either you take my hand now and walk with me back to the church and up that aisle, or I turn around and leave, alone." Jirou held out his hand, waiting for it to be joined with hers.

    "Jirou, I'll take neither," said, taking a deep breath. He was confused. "I can't take your hand." And now he was crushed. "Because…it's bad luck to see your bride before your wedding."

    "Don't you ever scare me like that again, ," Jirou said, smiling nonetheless. "I'll see you as you walk down that aisle."

    "I can't wait," said, a smile of her own on her face. What was it about Jirou that made all her troubles soar away? As soon as she had given him ample time to walk away, she made her way toward the church, no longer filled with feelings of doubt, but with feelings of hope for the future.

---

    "Do you, Akutagawa Jirou, wish to take as your lawfully wedded wife?"

    "I do."

    "And do you, , wish to take Akutagawa Jirou as your lawfully wedded husband?"

    "I do."

    "And so be it, by the powers vested in me…I pronounce you Husband and Wife. You may kiss the bride."

The wedding bells symbolized the beginning of a new life, and the sweet kiss shared between the newlyweds symbolized their great understanding and love for each other.

    "You're crying," Hiyoshi snickered, looking at his ex-teammate and friend.

    "Shut up, so are you," Shishido retorted, unable to hold back the tears.

    "A happy ending, so sweet," Ohtori chirped in, wiping his own tears from his eyes. "I have a feeling that they'll be together…forever."

fin
soh
3.December.2005